Cute Photo

Inner Peace?

If you can start the day without caffeine,

If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,

If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it,

If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,


If you can take criticism and blame without resentment ,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without a glass of wine,

if you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

...Then You Are ��Probably

...The family dog!!

Tasteless Joke - A frog calls a psychic

Recently, the Psychic Hotline and Psychic Friends Network have launched hotlines for frogs. Here is the story of one frog and his discussing with his psychic.

A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?"

"No," says the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class."

Classic Super Bowl Commercial (Bridgestone)

It's almost time for the big game. If the game is lousy, there are always the commercials!

The Holidays are Coming!

"Swine Flu Paranoia?"

Amora Therapy for Dogs?

The Winner at Dog Obedience School

Stupid Animal Joke

It's been a while since I posted one of these, so here it goes...and yes, it is really stupid:

Some race horses staying in a stable. One of them starts to boast about his track record. "In the last 15 races, I've won 8 of them!"

Another horse breaks in, "Well in the last 27 races, I've won 19!!"

"Oh that's good, but in the last 36 races, I've won 28!", says another, flicking his tail.

At this point, they notice that a greyhound dog has been sitting there listening. "I don't mean to boast," says the greyhound, "but in my last 90 races, I've won 88 of them!"

The horses are clearly amazed. "Wow!" says one, after a hushed silence. "A talking dog."

Goldfish Joke

Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the little girl was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Nancy?"

"My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him."

The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Nancy patted down the last heap of earth and then replied, "That's because he's inside your stupid cat."

Classic Super Bowl Commercial - Goldfish

A classic pet related Super Bowl commercial. In this one, "Sparky" the goldfish plays dead until a boy holds a Pepsi over his tank and he performs tricks. Dad is clueless, though, and flushes the lifeless fish (a common practice).

Later, we see Sparky in the ocean doing back flips for a fisherman.

Another example of how pets help sell products.

Trackposted to Big Dog's Weblog, Cao's Blog, The Random Yak, third world county, and The Yankee Sailor, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.

Classic Super Bowl Ad - Beer Fetching Dog

Two guys comparing the neat tricks their dogs can do. Not the most tasteful ad, but still a big game classic.

Singles Ad

This has to be one of the best singles ads ever printed. It is reported to have been listed in the Atlanta Journal.

SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cozy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Call (xxx) xxx-6420 and ask for Daisy, I'll be waiting..

And who was this ad for??





Over 15,000 men found themselves talking to the Atlanta Humane Society...

Dogs Rule the World?

I saw an old Jerry Seinfeld bit, and he wondered how aliens looking down at the world perceive our hierarchy. We walk our dogs and pick up after them in little bags that we then carry with us.

The aliens are looking down and thinking the dogs must be the rulers. Why else would someone walk behind them carrying their poop for them in bags?

Over Paid Parrot Joke

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical looking parrots on a perch and says: "The parrot on the left costs $500 dollars". "Why does the parrot cost so much?" asks the man. The owner says, "Well the parrot knows how to use a computer".

The man then asks about the next parrot and is told that this one costs $1,000 dollars because it can do everything the first parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system.

Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot and is told that it costs $2,000 dollars. Needless to say this begs the question, "What can it do?". To which the owner replies, "To be honest I have never seen it do a thing but the other two call him boss!".

"Cat & Paper Towel" Picture

Stupid Dog Joke - Thinking Fast

Two men are walking their dogs, a poodle and a german shepard. They decide they'd like to go into a bar for a drink. "But we can't bring out dogs into that bar," says the poodle's human. "Hey, no problem," says the german shepard's owner. "Just watch this" He pulls out a pair of sunglasses and walks into the bar. "Hey, no dogs!" yells the bartender. "But this is a seeing eye dog," says the german shepard's human.

The bartender apologizes and shows them to a chair. So, the poodle owner decides to follow suit, whips out his sunglasses, and walks into the bar. "Hey, no dogs!" yells the bartender. "But this is a seeing eye dog," says the poodle's human. The bartender objects, "Hey, poodles can't be seeing eye dogs!". The poodle owner gasps "Poodle? They told me they were giving me a german shepard!".

"Cat in Crocs" Picture

I admit it, I own a pair of these too....and yes, my friends and relative make fun of me! So, when I saw this picture, I had to laugh.

By the way, they are very comfortable.

"Cat's Revenge?" Picture

Open Letter To Our Pets

I've printed this before, but it's still funny and right-on!

Dear Dogs and Cats,

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food.

Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.

Beating me to the bottom is not the object.

Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort.

Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, and try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt.

I cannot stress this enough!